In spite of the intentionally provocative title, I understand that people will have different needs. It may well be that, for you, going for a few weeks without Facebook could be a good thing. But I do want to push back against what's become a popular thing for Lenten-observant Christians to do these days, and offer a reason not to just do what others are doing.

Former PC(USA) General Assembly Moderator Bruce Reyes-Chow posted an excellent reflection on the matter a couple of years ago (this link leads to archived version via Archive.org), but to be frank, I doubt most of my non-Presbyterian friends (or even some of my more conservative friends among those who are Presbyterian) will see his name as a reliable source on the subject. But since this is a Fuller blog, I'll instead share something I learned from one of our professors a year ago that I think makes the point in another way, although I have to go without names and places here in the interest of the privacy of some of the other people involved in the story. This professor attends a church that my wife and I used to attend when we first got married, and although we are all Caucasian, it is important to note that this church is predominately Asian (actually, a very specific ethnicity within the broader Asian context, but again, I'm trying to protect privacy here).

Anyway, during the Lenten season a year or so ago, a high school student in that church's community who was shot and killed in what sounds like gang-related violence. Although the student was not a part of a family that attended that church, one of the church's members had a connection to the student, and so the church was invited to do the funeral service. Although the church is predominately one particular ethnicity, and the student's community was another, the church saw this as an opportunity to build relationships with those who had been affected by the student's death. As is not uncommon in many churches, the funeral service included an invitation to learn more about Christ (side note: these things must be done very gently, recognizing that people at funerals are in a very vulnerable state. I trust the professor when he tells me that this invitation was very appropriate). Apparently some 80 students filled out cards and gave their Facebook addresses.

That's the part that surprised me. The contact information of choice for these young people was Facebook. The professor didn't mention home addresses, telephone numbers, or e-mail. Just Facebook addresses. Here are people asking to start conversations with people who call themselves Christians, and they're asking to do so on Facebook. If members of the church that held the funeral had decided to stop using Facebook for Lent, who would be left to engage these people in the conversations they're asking to have?

I often hear people talk about how Facebook (and other Internet venues) don't foster "real" relationships. One person I've read specifically advocated for giving up Facebook for Lent and using that time to engage someone in a "real" face-to-face conversation. The idea that Facebook relationships are somehow less "real" is something I very much want to push against. I certainly don't mean to say that one should use Facebook to the exclusion of face-to-face relationships. That way lies madness. There is no substitute for such "non-virtual" contact. But nonetheless, Facebook communication is real communication. There are live human beings on the other ends of those computer terminals reading what we have to say. While face-to-face communication may well be better for certain needs, Facebook is better for others. Many of the friends I have on Facebook are dear friends that I simply wouldn't currently be in contact with at all without it. Others are people that I am able to learn more about because we can grab those snippets of time on Facebook when a more personal contact simply isn't available to us (say, when both of us are at work, not currently engaged in a task for our jobs, but able to take a couple of minutes to say "hi" before the next task comes in). There is real communication that takes place here that wouldn't happen at any other time, and giving that communication up may not actually do anything that helps draw us closer to each other nor to God. And if something being given up for Lent doesn't draw us closer, then it's missing the point of why people give things up for Lent in the first place.

So, by all means, you should make your own decision about how you should observe Lent. If something's keeping you from a closer relationship with God or with other people, then by all means consider giving it up, at least for a few weeks. But don't just do it because other people have been doing it. Consider what you're giving up, and why.